Cunt Examination
Stick with me; I know this is a harsh title and I use a bad word, a lot.
It wasn’t until we were married for several years that I realized that the Wife-Beast didn’t know the word “cunt.” Just didn’t know it. Thought I made it up. She was completely immune to the word. Apathetic.
I’d say the word and cringe, waiting for her to throw a shoe at me. No shoe.
And then she’d smile and start singing, “Cunt, cunt, cunt, cunt. Cunt, cunt, cunt.” Shrug her shoulders and smile again. “You’re kidding me. That’s not a word.”
This whole cunt dance made me very uncomfortable. I’d answer, “No you’re kidding me. I’m getting set up. You’re going to do something really, really bad to me.”
Turns out, she didn’t know the word.
Oh, she’s caught up. I can’t say the c-word anymore; and neither will she.
:::
A friend of mine emailed this to me this evening:
Cunt Examination
According to the Weird Asian News website, that’s a real sign somewhere in Asia.
The Weird Asian News continued the same post by reporting that some dope on Craigslist is offer “man cunt” examinations. This made me remember something from my not-so-distant past:
I made it to a lot of my wife’s doctor’s appointments during her pregnancy. One of her doctors, Doctor Jackman, and I got along very well. We’d often bump into each other at the store or at the hospital or at some social gathering or another and, I think, enjoyed each other’s brief company.
One day after a particularly frustrating afternoon on the phone with my doctor and my HMO, I bumped into Dr. Jackman and asked him if he’d by primary physician.
“Of course,” he dead-panned. “But the exams are going to be a bitch.”
If you liked that, maybe you will like this:
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